I will say, however, that purchasing an international airline ticket not even 14 hours before your flight takes off is overwhelming, and certainly left me in a cloud of disbelief the entire time I was overseas. I actually extended my trip by 3 days once I was there to be able to stay for my Nagymama's memorial, and even in the (what ended up being) 12 days I was there, I never felt like I was actually there. I told my mom as I was packing and getting ready to leave that I felt like it would all sink once I touched ground in Atlanta again -- and as I was driving back from Atlanta, it still felt normal. Like I drive home from Atlanta semi-regularly, so what was any different about this? What a feeling.
I was asked a few times how I had family in Hungary or what the connection was (so many thanks to those of you that emailed and tweeted to send me distractions... so much love, so much appreciated). My grandparents (mom's side) were born and raised in Budapest, and fleed (flew?) Hungary in 1956 during the Hungarian Communist Revolution and ended up in the US. They eventually moved to LA, where my mom and aunt were born, and stayed until the Wall fell and moved back to Hungary in 1989. They came back every to spend every Christmas with us, and my parents took us out there every 3 years (1990, 1993, and 1996); in 2000, after my freshman year of high school, my sister and I went out there by ourselves to spend a month with our grandparents. So while I don't speak Hungarian well (far from it!), I understand enough to put pieces of conversations together and really, could probably respond if I really needed to.
Those past two weeks were crazy, unbelieveable, overwhelming, and truthfully, just cloudy. We are all just so utterly heartbroken with this extremely unexpected change. Heartbroken. I just can't believe Nagymama is gone, and I am just so thankfully that I got to spend Christmas with her again, just like we used to. I love you, Nagymama -- hope you're having a great dance in heaven with Nagypapa. <3
View from my run - Lake Velence, Hungary. |
Palacsinta (crepes) date with mom - choclate and walnut! Yum! |
The church where my Nagymama and Nagypapa got married -- and where we held her memorial service. |
Thank you all for your love, comments, tweets, emails, texts, messages for my family and I. They are so very much appreciated, welcomed, and truly warmed my heart and helped even just a little. I'm blessed to have such a great community of support, even from all across the web! <3